I’m using Emotionally Focused Individual Therapy and I keep ‘tripping’ on EFIT Tango Move 2: Assembling and Deepening Emotion. Ugh! Why is working with emotion in this experiential way so hard? Have you got any tips to help me ‘dance’ this move more smoothly with clients?
‘Tripping’ in Tassie
Dear ‘Tripping’,
Ah, the EFIT Tango Move 2 conundrum! I hear you. First, it may help to know you’re not alone. In supervision and training, EFIT therapists overwhelmingly report that Move 2 is the trickiest of all! Assembling and Deepening Emotion often feels like you’re stepping on your own – or your client’s – toes. Let’s break it down and see if we can smooth out those steps.
Why is this so tough?
Working with emotion experientially can be challenging because it asks us to dive deep into the client’s emotional experience in a very present and intentional way. It’s not just about recognizing emotions but truly engaging with them, understanding their depth, and helping clients articulate and process them. This requires a high level of sensitivity, presence, and skill, which can be overwhelming at times.
Here’s a little guide to help you find your rhythm in the EFIT Tango:
- Stay in the Here-and-Now:
Remember, the goal of Move 2 is to help clients connect with their immediate emotional experience. Keep your focus on what’s happening right now in the session. Encourage clients to describe their feelings and physical sensations in the present moment. This can help both you and your client stay anchored. - Reflect and Validate:
Use reflective listening to mirror back what you’re hearing. Validating your client’s emotions—showing that you understand and accept their feelings—can help deepen the emotional experience. For example, you might say, “It sounds like you’re feeling really overwhelmed right now. Is that right?” This helps clients feel heard and understood, making it easier for them to explore their emotions. - Ask Open-Ended Questions:
When exploring emotions, open-ended questions can guide clients to delve deeper. Questions like, “Can you tell me more about what you’re feeling right now?” or “What’s it like to experience this emotion in your body?” can encourage clients to expand on their emotional experience and give you more to work with. - Use Emotionally Evocative Language:
Be mindful of your language and use words that evoke and deepen emotional experiences. For instance, instead of just asking “How does that make you feel?” try “What is the most intense part of this feeling for you right now?” This helps clients access and articulate deeper layers of emotion. - Practice Patience and Compassion:
Both for yourself and your clients. Emotional work can be slow and sometimes uncomfortable. Give yourself permission to stumble a bit and learn as you go. The more you practice, the more fluid and intuitive this process will become. - Seek Supervision and Peer Support:
Don’t hesitate to bring these challenges to your supervision sessions. A skilled supervisor can offer you tailored advice, role-play scenarios, and provide feedback to help you navigate these tricky moves with more confidence.
Remember, every EFIT therapist finds their groove at their own pace. It’s like learning any new dance: there will be stumbles, but with practice and persistence, you’ll find your rhythm. Keep at it, and those steps will start to feel more natural.
Hope these tips help you glide through Tango Move 2 with more ease!
